Creativity- Goal Post

As I begin to wrap up the first draft of my introduction for the thesis paper, I feel the loss of something.

I cannot quite pinpoint this loss but I do have an inkling of what it might be. I felt lost because somehow while writing the research paper, the idea of technicalities became clear. It became clear that to some extent, my research paper has to remain just that: a research paper. It's difficult or even frivolous to try to inject creativity in the manner I want to. If it was up to me, I would refuse to follow a specific format or even use an overtly formal tone. However, that's not how research papers work. I realize now that my paper can be creative in the way I tell the story but it does have to maintain an air of formality and clinicality, due to the scientific nature of my research.

And though I feel that loss of something, I am extremely glad to have come to this realization because it means I can do something about it. It means I can separate the pragmatics from the rest and commandeer my research in the way I had visioned from the beginning.

I understand and recognize that my paper must be formal and follow a specific format. However, that does not have to mean that my creativity must be suffocated. Through the self designed assignments, I can still shed light onto ideas I value and mean more to me- in the way I want to.

In order to not feel like a portion of my brain is not being utilized, it's important for me to work on a self designed assignment alongside each of the sections of the paper. Since a first draft of my introduction is completed, it's important that I begin to plan the self designed to complement it. For my own sanity, I feel the need for both.

For my next SDA, I hope to create something that fits the creative piece to complement the introduction. While the introduction is meant to be a piece for the outreach of my research, the SDA complement would be the creative outlet, that reinforces meaning for myself.

As of now, I have my heart set on creating a painting for the second SDA. At first, I was playing around with ideas of painting a sleep deprived brain in order to further analyze the effects on waking hours. However, I feel as though I need to take a step back, for the piece to go along smoothly with the introduction. Instead, I want to actually paint something that shows the significance of dream research in the bigger picture, because that complements the beginning of the thesis paper better. In my introduction, I discussed the idea of wanting to bridge the gap between the curousities of the past by contemporary science and I hope to illustrate the importance of that through this specific painting.

My vision is tell a story through both the thesis paper and the Self Designed Assignments in tro different ways. While the paper will compile information and reach outwards with words, the SDAs will tell the same story visually and more creatively.